19th Birthday in less than 24 hrs time...
But somehow, i wasn't really getting excited about it..
What had happen to me?? Is it because i'm no longer as young/ childish as i used to be?
Or is it because i'm getting older? Hmm...
Well, i doubt i will be celebrating my birthday this year,
Perhaps with some close friends for some drink?
Nah, lets see how it goes then :)
Looking back at my past,
I really regretted i gave up a-lot of chances and things.
Since young, i don't appreciated things and people,
Some incidents will never be forgotten..
Well, i really miss my bio-logical mum a lot,
Its been almost 6 years since she left me,
Time passes real fast, and to think about it,
I think i really live my past 6 years in vain.
Hmm..Well, i got to know a lot of friends,
Regardless of whether they are the nerdy type or the gangster type,
I made a lot of friends from there, turning bad, worsen, and changing back to a better self,
I guess its parts and parcels of life?
Came to think about it, sometimes i really felt disappointed with some of my friends,
I really wont get it, i mean, why are they giving up their futures?
Drinks,Smoke,club,drugs,fights etc, why must they get themselves into trouble?
Friends surrounding me had been caught and sent into Boy's/Girl's home, prison due to their "brave" acts.
Most of my friends are doing crimes, stealing of things, drugs abusing, fighting which eventually leads them to court cases, and jails. Some might think its very powerful of having records, its like having some "winds" , and without thinking about their future. Seeing one by one my friends were caught for all those crimes, i am really disappointed. Even the one that i really close to did the same too. [Sigh]
I didn't say that i'm totally pure over here, i mean, who doesn't have rebellious days? I'm sure all of you out there are rebellious at certain age. I'm really glad that i got people to pull me out of it to prevent me from sinking deeper into the trap, i'm considering lucky enough that i got those kind friends who pull me out, though at times i might be harsh on them, but in my heart, i'm really gladful.
I miss most of my friends that i really lost contact with, Guys, i really miss you. [Sigh] I miss those days where we hang out together,joke,lame together.. Chai Peng Jie,Joey Jie,Kok Chin Daddy,Xavier and the rest of the Ah Family, i really miss you guys. It seems like we had really drifted alot alot...[Sigh]
While writing this entry, i recalled back a lot of memories, regardless of whether its sad or happy, my heart is sinking, I cant seems to know where I'm heading to, I'm like in the middle of the sea.. Argh, Shall end my posts here.
* To all my friends :
-Though some of us had lost contacts, but i wont forget you guys, hope that we will meet again! For those that i genuine trying to pull you guys out of the bad companies, i hope you all can step back and think about your future, i don't wish to see you stepping on my footsteps, i wished you guys well. What ever it is, take good care of yourselves, regardless of where you are now~
[ Let out a heavy Sigh] I know this post is rather emotional, but i am really feeling sad now~
♥ xiiao michelle ♥
